Directed by Louis Leterrier
A more apropos title for this film would have been “Squabble of the Bearded Ones”. Seriously, for a movie called “Clash of the Titans” (“Titans” being the key word in that phrase as far as I’m concerned) I expected some god damn Titans in the movie. I expected to see Zeus up against Kronos or some such match up. Instead, what we get is a movie that references these Titans once in the beginning minute and then never mentions them again. I suppose the “Titans” in this film refer to the Olympian gods and the humans brave enough to stand against them, but I’m sorry that’s just not good enough for me. It’s not cool enough for me. This film was one giant disappointment.
I’ll give “Clash of the Titans” this, on the surface, it sure is pretty. The film looks like it cost the hundred million dollars I’m sure it cost to make. So, it has that going for it. And the action scenes are relatively thrilling if not all together anti-climactic from a storytelling standpoint. (Seriously, that’s the final battle, really? It was the easiest vanquish of a big bad I have ever seen in an action movie… ever.) But everything else in the movie just doesn’t mesh. From the story, to the dialogue, to the stilted acting. How a film has both Ralph Fiennes and Liam Neeson and still manages to squander both of their immense talents is beyond me. I will say that Gemma Arterton sure is pretty though. And Sam Worthington does an admirable job with the little direction that was no doubt given to him. (“Now just look right past the camera and be brooding Sam. Yes, great, just like that.”)
I think that the worst part comes at the very end of the film. Now the following comment is slightly spoilerish so if you don’t want anything ruined for you don’t read it…
The moment went Liam Neeson shows up at the very end of the film and basically takes credit for helping defeat the “evil” Hades it down right atrocious. Now, just a second, but wasn’t Zeus the real bad guy of this film? I mean he is, after all, the man (I’m sorry, god… no wait, sorry again… “Titan”) that put Hades into the predicament that he was in in the first place. He also ordered the Kraken to be unleashed with full knowledge that it was probably going to kill everyone. But here he is showing up at the end of the film and joking around with Perseus, a man who hates him, but now all of a sudden can’t wait to get a hug from “Daddy.” There was no reasonable explanation for including this scene in the film. It went completely against everything that we discovered about these two characters from the start of the film. All it did was remind me of this “Justice League of America” cartoon I watched a couple of years ago. Basically everyone (Green Lantern, Batman, The Flash, and Martian Manhunter) defeat the big bad and at the very end of the film, Aquaman shows up to have his picture taken with the rest of them, effectively taking credit for the battle. In a cartoon about superheroes, that’s forgivable and also funny. In a 120 million + dollar film, it’s just plain ineptitude.
Will “Clash of the Titans” entertain you for 2 hours? No. It might entertain you for about an hour spread throughout. So the decision to watch the movie is purely up to you. In the meanwhile you can at least check out the amusingly overly intense trailer: